A Christmas sweater: white reindeer and snowflakes
on dark green, red, and cream.

The soft knit felt best against my skin.
I wore it nearly every day, loving that the sleeves were a little loose,
that my hands could hide inside them.

It was thin compared to the other sweaters.
It breathed with me.

The crew neck made it look clean and modest.
I didn’t like wearing bras, though, and so I ruined that.

I was always looking for the undershirts of my youth —
the ones like tank tops with a tiny bow at the breast —
but they didn’t make them for adults.

A shame, I always thought.

Only emaciated women could squeeze into them,
when the rest of us
would have liked the same option.

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