As a young girl I was taught agency as something outside myself—
an external doctrine I had to be instructed into.

They said it was freedom while punishing me every time I exercised
this thing of the mind they spoon-fed me through the long course of my youth.

I learned I always had a choice, but that my choice better follow
the acceptable path—or my agency would be taken away for being “misused.”

It was conditional.

I learned to fear choice, fear responsibility, fear the difference
in myself mirrored back.

Fear growth that strayed beyond small teachings.

That feels like lifetimes ago.

Agency was always mine—inner knowing, intuition’s quiet recognition,
the soul speaking through the heart.

A gift from God, never a tool of submission, but a brilliant purpose and intent
that I live a life alive for Him—vibrant with possibility, true in its authenticity,
growing my soul-up beneath the safety of His love.

© 2025 Raven | Jasmine on the Grave. All rights reserved.